This is not a blog about asking for help. It's not something that I am doing because I want for atheists to talk me down or convince me there is no God; likewise, it's not for Christians to try and sway my ideologies and use it as a forum to promote their own beliefs.
This is a blog that I am doing because I need to. I need to express my innermost thoughts about the walk of faith that I have teetered on for what seems like eternity. It is a basis for me to talk about my feelings about my life, my family, my friends, and the spiritual journey that goes along with it, sometimes with praise, sometimes with disdain.
It should be a raw examination of my fluctuating soul's path. Does this mean my posts and thoughts will always be pretty? Nope. Does it mean that it will reach the darkest reaches of my mind? Nope. But I will try with all of my might to be honest with myself, honest with my feelings, and to do it in a way that others who may be struggling with the idea of faith and their spiritual experience can understand that they are not the only one out there who questions, rejoices, condemns, and who thinks and rethinks common and not-so-common practices within Christianity.
What's the goal of this then? Ultimately, is to form a true belief structure: to define my life. To find out in my own experience if Jesus Christ is something that I can take that enormous leap of faith towards and live my life in the way that I believe he has entrusted to do. I would love to say that this will certainly have a happy ending and my joy will be found in the Holy Spirit; but I would be a fool to blindly say that it will--it has been a struggle for me and probably will be for a while.
Please join me in my journey. I look forward to discussing things with each and every one of you. Thanks for reading.
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